A Parade and No Rain

I live in an apartment overlooking the roof of a private school for wealthy children as well as a parking lot in the near distance.

A couple of trees partially obstruct the view of the parking lot across the street from the First Unitarian Church on 12th Avenue, but I can usually make out the chaos that erupts in the parking lot whenever a big event happens in town.

The lot is sort of cramped and many drivers I witness simply lack the skills it takes to park there without growing frustrated and confused.

In a car society it's frightening how many people don't know how to take command of that ton or more of steel and metal between their legs.

Parking is an ordeal that is fun to watch as one moron after another slaves to inch into a space they'll triumphantly pay $7.00 for when they've shot their last frustrated ounce of good sense.

Tonight Portland is celebrating its annual Rose Festival Starlight Parade, a tradition among this city's most escapist and dumb denizens.

On the avenues, people were conspiratorially setting up their viewing areas along the parade route by noon today to watch this great, silly tradition.

Arriving early is part of the parade's tradition.  To claim a sidewalk viewing space is of paramount importance to many Portlanders and tourists, but  a few years ago Portland's City Council deigned to make it illegal to set up early in the day and claim a spot along the sidewalk.

No duct-taping allowed.

Portland is a liberal town, still attempting to achieve the unobtainable fair and equitable deliverance of sidewalk viewing of its parades.

More socially uninhibited chaos has resulted.  More law-breaking, animosity and good fun.

As with the laws governing Metro's transit fares, you're only fined if you get caught cheating under the city's ordinances.

People set up on the street and wander away.

I could have nabbed a few free lawn chairs today, but the neighborly sorts were eyeing me closely as I passed.  The early setup is a private, clubbing affair, a shared movement among lawbreakers who watch each others' backs like common thieves.

The parade is passing near my street as I write this and people are having a great time, whooping and yelling at the paraders.

I hear a marching band playing an old saw.

The city's buses are at a standstill as the parade passes.

A helicopter is hovering above my building, which always pisses me off.

I have no cause or desire to be out there.  I've missed the Portland Rose Festival Starlight Parade once again.

Just hearing it is too much for my being.


TS