The Plan and a Warning

Tonight is the night. The Farewell Wake, a digital film by Charles Deemer, has its world premier at 7 p.m. at the Blackbird Wine Shop (4323 N.E. Fremont), in Portland, Oregon. I plan on going and behaving like Peter O'Toole and Richard Burton on a drunken night in London, circa the 60s.

That is, I will be the show and Deemer's film will be secondary, an afterthought, a mote in his Dionysian quest.

I plan to steal the show (remarkable for a 2 min. cameo)!

I will strut and preen and walk about as if I own the feature. I will slap the backsides of beautiful women and unleash my wicked, egomaniacal movie star persona on everyone. I will make a statement. Unfettered, I will box any man's ears who thinks I am a anything short of a genius!

I, TS, am the world's greatest actor!

And I will prove it to the world tonight, playing Buddy Dooley, a pathetic and jealous former friend of the movie's protagonist.

I expect the police to show up!

I will be signing autographs and accepting plaudits and glasses of wine all night.

Thank you, everybody!

TS