Watch Out!

The entire situation has me worried.

No, no, no, not the trickle-down theory that is Round Bend Press (the world will catch up one day), but rather the PAC-12 Championship game, sponsored by UPS and Dr. Pepper (gag me with too much sugar or whatever it is that makes that soft drink product so wretched).

Gag me again because I am about tired of the corporate sponsorship philosophy, even if it is a more realistic view of the world than my own...

No, the football game between UCLA and Oregon set for Eugene tomorrow night gives me pause.

Few people are giving UCLA a chance, and that makes me uncomfortable. With all the distractions surrounding this matchup, I'm hoping Oregon doesn't get lost in the sea-swell of hype (or lampooning) that has dominated the sport's discourse leading up to the game.

Oregon was lost in the hype last month when USC played in Autzen, the supposed loudest stadium in the land, which became very quiet for some reason. Standing on the sideline during that game was a gaggle of NBA stars team President Phil Knight brought to the game just for fun.

A show of shows.

That little gambit cost Oregon, I'm convinced, though one can't conjure empirical evidence on the matter. It appeared to me that the Oregon players were more interested in gathering autographs than touchdowns for three quarters.

This week, Oregon can't even practice inside the football stadium. UPS and Dr. Pepper have colluded with PAC officials to make over the Autzen interior in their images.

Football players would be in the way of the advertising drones.

Good lord, will there be a football game Friday night or a convention of UPS and Dr. Pepper super salesmen?

Oregon is favored by 30, but give me a break. Last I looked UCLA is not a team of 2011 Pop Warner All-Stars. It has big, fast kids (and a few men) on its roster. They landed at the L.A. school for a reason after all. They earned scholarships because at some point in their football careers they could play the game and play it at a high level.

Oregon better push the distractions aside this week, unlike that evening last month when Dwayne Wade tried to talk Chip Kelly into playing quarterback for a series and Kelly almost caved in.

UCLA's players are gonna come out and play hard for their lame-duck coach, Rick Neuheisel.

Money can't buy that kind of emotion.

I think I'll go to the betting parlor today and put money on the Bruins to cover.


TS