Thursday, September 12, 2013

A Metaphor Too Far

Ought to be a Star Wars-style weekend of college ball.  With both UCLA and Washington on furloughs last weekend, two of the PAC's best squads were MIA.

The MREs are a whole lot better this weekend, though Stanford vs. Army has the aura of an ugly Highway of Death mismatch and figures to be a real slaughter.

In other words, Stanford figures to drop a nuclear warhead on Army.

This is a game full of minefields for Army who will likely be KIA, if you know what I mean, like Custer.

I'm sorry, I don't mean to torture you (but if you have any complaints call Geneva, she'll know what to do).

I don't really care for Stanford's cerebral, CIA style, while admitting it is more effective than the SDI, obviously.  The future EXXON executives took Oregon down last year at a most inopportune time by employing their Condoleezza Rice-designed, DOD-approved shock and awe strategy--that was Ed Reynolds chasing MM down from behind while DAT flaunted his ICBM-like speed at the front, thus missing the target and costing Oregon the battle, which lost the team a BCSNC medal.

Speaking of surveillance...and further ridiculousness...

UCLA travels to Lincoln to play the Nebraska Cornhuskers in an intriguing Operation Groggy Morning conflict between ranked companies, and Washington takes a battalion across several rivers to Champaign, Illinois for night maneuvers a little later. These two skirmishes will provide us with some heretofore known unknowns about the strength of the PAC's insurgency across the USA.

I don't have enough  listening and imaging devices to monitor all the action this weekend, and then there is this conflict of interest--Oregon and Tennessee trade sorties at the same time Alabama and TAMU get it on in the propaganda war of the week.

Johnny Football vs. the Evil Empire.

If I surveille the action at home I can put up several windows at a time for maximum infiltration, I guess. Thanks to the miracle of computing technology passed down to us commoners by the MIC. I'll click back and forth like a drone pilot.  But more likely I'll just grow immersed in the Oregon game and wait for the other games' highlights--watch the carnage unfold from outer space.

Who doesn't like surveilling Oregon?  Not me.  I expect up-and-coming Tennessee to battle to the end like Davy Crockett. Ought to be entertaining as heck, unless the Ducks commit treason in the fourth quarter and expose their secret playbook as a sham.

If that happens I'll just kill myself and get it over with.

A case of PTSD.  I won't LOL this time.  I mean it.


TS

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